Two-Headed Shark Attack


You try hard not to do it. You fight it. But inevitably over time it builds and then you finally have to do it. You just have to watch a really horrible movie. So, the other evening, I slunk off to the video room, closed the drapes, locked the door and shamefully took the plunge ( no pun intended ) and watched Two-Headed Shark Attack. It’s interesting that in the old days, you would have [insert name of big studio] doing a film by [insert name of famous director] starring [insert name of famous actor]. Now, you spend the first five minutes or more of a film watching a litany of strange organizations sponsoring a film in the apparent hope that by throwing a minimal amount of money in the pot, they’ll make a return on their investment. Of course, when the only “name” among the cast is Carmen Electra (who?), you know you’re headed for the deep six. Carmen’s best scene is where she lies squirming on the deck of the sinking yacht rubbing oil on her bikini clad body. She does get to deliver some telling dialogue when she yells at the usual bevy of teenie victims to “Get out of the water!” When the survivors make it to a small atoll, realizing that even two-headed sharks have difficulty attacking scantily clad women on land, the writers of this epic conveniently have the atoll sinking into the sea. We even polish off a couple with a Tsunami that suddenly appears with no explanation. The nice thing about having a shark with two heads is that even after you destroy one of the heads, the shark still has one left to finish off all but the final babe survivor. Bon appetite! Or is that “Bomb appetite?”



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One thought on “Two-Headed Shark Attack

  1. Wait a minute… are we still talking about Congressmen? Either way, I liked it, I liked it alot… it is a little freaky in there (inside your head)…. no wonder you don’t sleep at night. Keep it up this little experiment of ours is going very well !

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